Works her jaw and looks down at their entwined hands. They're quiet, but Kate can feel the crack of her heart. Pain, desperation, regret.
And something warmer sifting underneath it all, the sweetness only bolstering the hurt.]
I wasn't sure. But I wondered.
[The glitter. Maybe she'd picked it up around the place, maybe Camille got it on her after she'd sprung her from the coffin. Maybe the black spots on Kanda's sword were a coincidence. Maybe the medicinal scent at his mouth was too. They didn't invent poison. The bear, lured in with the hunger inducing treats from the late night carnival. Left to finish the job, or clean up the mess.
People suspected Alfyn. People suspected Robin.
Camille suspected something worse. She takes a shaking breath. Moves one hand to her shoulder, soothing.]
It wasn't enough, was it? The coffin and the rope.
[Fright. Concern. Desperation, which can probably be felt in the way her grip tightens. Camille sighs and gives up on the hand holding. Instead she folds her arms around her. Draws her in. Fuck the soot stains, she's always in dark clothes anyway.]
You're a smart girl. I know you realize the risks. [That they'd do the same to her as was done to Camille. Needs must, and what have you.] I'll...If you trust someone, really trust them to not take advantage of you, maybe they can help. Or at least we can put our heads together without your tagalong listening in.
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... I think I'm always on edge, lately.
[ but after some hesitation, she will come sit next to her. ]
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I get it. It's getting worse, isn't it?
[She takes her hands in her own. A gentle squeeze. It does nothing to assuage the fretful airs between them. Camille wets her lips and pushes on.]
...Did you sleep last Thursday?
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and then her gaze falls, and she's just silent. ]
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And she waits.
Works her jaw and looks down at their entwined hands. They're quiet, but Kate can feel the crack of her heart. Pain, desperation, regret.
And something warmer sifting underneath it all, the sweetness only bolstering the hurt.]
I wasn't sure. But I wondered.
[The glitter. Maybe she'd picked it up around the place, maybe Camille got it on her after she'd sprung her from the coffin. Maybe the black spots on Kanda's sword were a coincidence. Maybe the medicinal scent at his mouth was too. They didn't invent poison. The bear, lured in with the hunger inducing treats from the late night carnival. Left to finish the job, or clean up the mess.
People suspected Alfyn. People suspected Robin.
Camille suspected something worse. She takes a shaking breath. Moves one hand to her shoulder, soothing.]
It wasn't enough, was it? The coffin and the rope.
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Perhaps it would have been, if it were anyone's plan but my own.
The monster knows what I'm doing at all times. If it doesn't like it, it can simply intervene. Our plan was sabotaged by my own hands.
[ there's just a hollow feeling at that. ]
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[Camille shakes her head. A fierce protectiveness pierces the gloom.]
At that point, it's not you doing it, Kate. You're not the monster. It's using you, not the other way around.
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[ somewhere in those depths of misery is a little glimmer of gratitude. her hands tremble slightly. ]
I understand now that I can't handle this by myself. Nor can I continue to burden just you and Famine with my problems.
I told Lavi what really happened. I may tell others, too.
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[Fright. Concern. Desperation, which can probably be felt in the way her grip tightens. Camille sighs and gives up on the hand holding. Instead she folds her arms around her. Draws her in. Fuck the soot stains, she's always in dark clothes anyway.]
You're a smart girl. I know you realize the risks. [That they'd do the same to her as was done to Camille. Needs must, and what have you.] I'll...If you trust someone, really trust them to not take advantage of you, maybe they can help. Or at least we can put our heads together without your tagalong listening in.
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That's my hope.
I've never been very good at trusting others. Maybe I am a controlling person... I always want to do things my way.
But I do believe that these are good people, and that they deserve trust.